Snow Days

Here in lovely Pennsylvania we are dealing with the windchill being below zero and snow! The snow isn't too bad. We've had a pretty easy winter until now.
I have rheumatoid arthritis in my feet and my right foot is a clubfoot. The weather hasn't been my friend. It's been up and down. Warm then cold then back again.  So it's been painful getting to this weather.
Call me crazy for preferring with the dull ache over the swelling. It's been crazy! Nothing has helped the swelling. I'm not going to lie. It's swollen while I'm sitting here, but I can still slip my shoes on so I'm ok with it. It's the summer humidity or rain humidity that I dislike.
With snow and these windchill comes many difficulties in this house.
Not just my physical health has been effected but Dalton's mental health. We've had 2 hour delays this week. Which throws him off entirely. His routine is changed at school. I know when I drove School Bus I always felt like I was running late all day on 2 hour delays.
He was crazy angry yesterday. So today Mom called from work and suggested I just kept the boys home. The roads were bad snow squalls were coming left and right. So I kept them home. Now 20 mins after their pick up time for the bus, the sun is shining!  Oh well! It's supposed to keep snowing off and on all day. Maybe they will have a fun snow day and I won't want to pull my hair out!
Part of yesterday's issue was Mommy had an epic meltdown. The biggest I've had since losing my brother. It was a meltdown mixed with a lovely anxiety attack. I cried so hard no one could understand me. I screamed at God! I mean I SCREAMED! Nothing I said was nice. Luckily the kids weren't home. But the mood it left me in was not me. Dalton is so in tune with my moods I'm sure he felt it. No I know he felt it. He came home and wanted to be left alone. He didn't want anyone in the room with him. He did everything he could to keep his brother out of the living room. So I know he felt it but didn't understand it.
I felt bad for him. I did. To feel that pain i was feeling and not understand it couldn't be easy. 

So today we are going to clean and just hang out. Cleaning always makes him feel better. Especially when it's done. He feels accomplished. Life feels better to him. Order feels better. So cleaning it shall be!
What do you do on snow days?
Is your little one in tune with your emotions?

Meltdowns and emotions

Dalton has multiple meltdowns. I feel bad for the little guy. He gets so angry. He's been bitting his brother alot. He used to hit. Now he bites. When he's angry he unleashes.
They've turned really verbally mean. Well physically too. He stomps and kicks things trying to break them.
The whole time I'm wishing I could just find out what's wrong. What's bothering him deep down.
It's not just that his brother wouldn't let him watch a video. It's been multiple things.  Then he finally let's go and WAM he's down right mean. Calls us jerks, mean and that we aren't his parents. Then starts kicking stuff. It usually happens because he's being sent to his room for his behavior. It's the one and only place he will calm down. When we finally get him there that is.
What kind of techniques do you use? He won't let us near him usually. So I can't get close enough to rub his back which if you catch it quick enough and are near you can stop the meltdown sometimes. Pressure on the hands and arms makes him mad. Brushing he hates. I'm just not sure.
I'm sure in his head he is so angry. We ask and he says,"I don't know". He very well may not.
My poor sweet boy

Maybe I could do this again

This last year has been a whirl wind of emotions.
A year ago tomorrow we lost my brother, my best friend in a tragic accident. He died in Maryland driving his 18 wheeler. It has by far been the hardest thing I've ever dealt with. It was the first death my children have had to deal with. Easy isn't a word that could describe life after a death of a sibling.
Over the summer we dealt with our oldest having vaso-vagal syncope. Basically he can dehydrate fast and pass out. His symptoms vary and we are still learning a year after diagnosis. This was our first summer with the diagnoses.
We also finally got an Autism diagnosis. PSP not otherwise specified is what's in the papers. He's high functioning but has a lot of sensory issues. We are working on helping him with those.
We also GOT MARRIED!!!  Yep after almost 10 years and 2 kids we finally got married. It was a wonderful ceremony. Our Pastor kept it short, on point and special. He's watched us grow as a family. We also had numerous special needs children in the church so short was perfect. Plus standing for any longer than 25 minutes may have been tough.
We only dealt with a few tears. Oh who am I kidding. I cried through the entire thing! He mentioned my brother and how the loss of him effected everyone.
I had planned with my brother awhile back for him to walk me down the aisle. Well Drake did. And it was so special. Dalton walked sis down and I met up with them at the front of the church.
We had a fabulous little picnic reception outside at the church. There was a slip n slide set up for the kids and everyone ate and chatted away. It was perfect!
Then came the worry of school starting. Dalton's new teachers and new building and no one knew of his new diagnosis.
We met up with his classroom teacher who is utterly amazing and Dalton adores him.
When I finally met up with his learning support teacher I knew we were in for a fabulous year. She's a caring and loving teacher. If he needs a hug he can just ask her and she will hug him. He's found his Mother figure in school.
Drake started kindergarten and wow! It's been an amazing year for him as well. He has the same teacher Dalton did. She's just amazing! She's on point and catches things most teachers wouldn't.
In October we finally got to go on our "Honeymoon". We went to Pigeon Forge, TN to a couples retreat. It was awesome. We learned how to love each other more through Christ. We did tourist things and just had a blast! We even rode horses! I haven't ridden since I was a teen!
Some time while we were there I broke the 5th metatarsal in my clubfoot. Yep. I did. Haha! No idea on when or how.
Christmas was low key and awesome. The kids got the things the asked for and we had an amazing break. There were many emotional moments though. The first year after a death you deal with all the firsts. I handled them really well. Helped Mom through them.
Now we are dealing with the year anniversary. It seems to be effecting me mentally more than I want it to.
You see my brother died 6 days before Dalton's 8th Birthday. Great thing to have hanging over your birthday huh? We work hard on not letting it last year. This year I'm trying too. It isn't easy but I'm trying! With not being able to sleep it isn't easy to not be moody.

Anyway, there's been a lot of up and downs this year. The ups have been amazing!

I think this blog may have a turn and be more about life with children with special needs.
A child diagnosed with Autism, bi-polar,  adhd and anxiety makes for some rough days. But it also makes for amazing times.

Currently we are dealing with insurances. They refuse to cover his need for a weighted blanket. His dr deems it medically necassary. The insurance says there's no proof they help.
Lord help me find a way to make this work. We are a limited income family and we need things to help him make life a bit easier on him!